Staying positive in difficult times

Life is very strange right now. As the UK heads into the “Delay” phase of its Coronavirus action plan, there might be many times when you feel it’s hard to stay positive. With so much uncertainty, how can we stay positive no matter what comes our way? Here we share our tips for staying positive no matter how life events may turn out over the coming months.

Don’t confuse quitting with letting go

Instead of hanging on to ideas, beliefs, and even people that are no longer healthy for you, try to trust your judgement to let go of negative forces in their lives. It’s important at times like these to surround yourself in a network of healthy relationships. Try using the following mantra [1] to help support you in this, which goes:

I will grant myself the ability to trust the healthy people in my life … To set limits with, or let go of, the negative ones … And to have the wisdom to know the DIFFERENCE!  

Make it make a good day

Waiting, hoping and wishing seldom have a place in the vocabulary of positive individuals. Try to be pro-active and not reactive. Passivity leads to a lack of involvement – instead try to be more involved in constructing your life. You can do this by working to make the changes you need to feel better in tough times like these rather than wishing your feelings away.

Staying positive

Keep the past in the past

Good and bad memories alike stay where they belong – in the past where they happened. Try not to spend much time pining for the good ol’ days – instead focusing on making new memories now.

Resist the urge to use the negative pulls from the past for self-flagellation or unproductive regret. Instead, foster productive regret [2] where lessons learned are used as stepping stones towards a better future.

Be grateful

The most positive people are the most grateful people. They don’t focus on the potholes in their lives. Instead, switch your mind to focusing on the pot of gold that awaits you every day. Notice the new smells, sights, feelings and experiences that bring you joy – by doing this you will see life as a treasure chest full of wonder rather than something to be endured.

Be energized by possibilities

Ever caught yourself focusing on what you can’t do, not what you can do? Now try switching that around and see how you feel.

Know this – there isn’t a perfect solution to every problem, but instead there are many solutions and possibilities. Don’t be afraid to attempt new solutions to old problems, rather than spin your wheels expecting things to be different this time.

Positive people refuse to be like Charlie Brown [3] expecting that this time Lucy will not pull the football away from him!

Ditch the fear

Did you know that people defined and pulled back by their fears never really truly live a full life? That’s because, while proceeding with appropriate caution, they do not let fear keep them from trying new things.

Instead, realize that even failures are necessary steps for a successful life [4]. Have confidence that you can get back up when they are knocked down by life events or their own mistakes, and cultivate a strong belief in your personal resilience.

Smile

When you feel positive on the inside it is like you are smiling from within, and those smiles are contagious. And here’s the great thing – the more people spend time with positive people, the more they tend to smile too!

Even in tough times, try to see the see the lightness in life, and have a sense of humour – even when it is about yourself. You can still have a high degree of self-respect, without taking yourself too seriously!

Communicate

Confident communication [5] is the only way to connect with others in everyday life, esepcially in challenging times like these. When the world if fuelled by high emotion, try to avoid judgmental, angry interchanges, and don’t let someone else’s blow up give you a reason to react in kind.

This doesn’t mean you have to be a walk over. The rub is – you can still react calmly to a situation without being pushed around…although it does take practice!

Remember not to own problems that belong to someone else.

Make room for pain and sadness

One of the most common misperceptions about positive people is that to be positive, you must always be happy. This can not be further from the truth. Anyone who has any depth at all is certainly not happy all the time. Being sad [6], angry, disappointed are all essential emotions in life.

How else would you ever develop empathy for others if you lived a life of denial and shallow emotions?

Being positive isn’t about running from the gamut of emotions, but instead accepting that part of the healing process is to allow yourself to experience all types of feelings, not only happy ones. That said, all of this should be done with always holding hope [7] that there is light at the end of the darkness.

Be empowered

We all want to be empowered, and a surefire way of feeling empowered is by seeking out the support of others who are supportive and safe.

Limit interactions with those who are toxic in any manner. Know your basic human rights, and resist the urge to play the part of a victim. There is no place for holding grudges with a positive mindset. Forgiveness helps positive people become better, not bitter.

How about you? How many of the above do you personally find in yourself? We hope sharing the above qualities which you can cultivate in yourself will help you through these uncertain times. For more information about how our mindset workshops can support your employees, get in touch at info@selflove.today. Wishing you all well in keeping positive!

References

1. http://www.lifehack.org/articles/communication/level-up-your-communicationin-relationships-with-these-7-tips.html

2. http://www.lifehack.org/articles/lifehack/there-are-no-do-overs-but-there-aresecond-chances.html

3. http://www.lifehack.org/articles/lifestyle/be-lovable-without-turning-into-charliebrown.html

4. http://www.lifehack.org/articles/productivity/11-essential-habits-for-success.html

5. http://www.lifehack.org/articles/communication/enhancing-productivity-bycommunicating-effectively.html

6. http://www.lifehack.org/articles/lifehack/why-sadness-is-your-friend.html

7. http://www.lifehack.org/articles/communication/20-inspirational-quotes-tobrighten-your-day.html

8. http://www.lifehack.org/articles/lifehack/63-ways-to-build-self-confidence.html